Pasi Koetle opens up on father’s abandonment: “Don’t divorce your kids”

Scandal! actress Mapaseka “Pasi” Koetle revealed how her father’s abrupt departure from their family shaped her life.

The 36-year-old publicly addressed this childhood trauma and her own divorce during an emotional episode of the “Engineer Your Life” podcast titled “I Chose Forgiveness and Letting Go” (podcast interview).

Koetle expressed particular pain about her father vanishing after leaving her mother: “I forgave my dad. My dad left my mom and left us. I don’t have a problem with divorce, but don’t divorce your kids.” She recalled his sudden disappearance without explanation: “One day my dad was there, the following day he was not. Unlike now, we sit with our kids and say, ‘Oh my baby, mommy and daddy are going their separate ways.’ There was no conversation like that.”

The actress shared her long journey to forgiveness after suspecting her father departed to start his own church. “When I looked at him he made bad choices as a person. I don’t know if he left for a woman, but I suspect that maybe he did. When he left, he just left because he wanted to open his own church. That was his reason,” she stated, emphasizing: “What broke me is the fact that you can leave your wife, it’s fine, but not your kids.”

Koetle acknowledged taking years to process her emotions: “I realised that I’m actually sad, I’m actually angry… it took a while.” Her healing came through private resolution: “I just forgave him and I didn’t even tell him that I forgave him. I didn’t call him and say, ‘Oh listen, I forgive him.’ I just forgave him.”

The actress contrasted her father’s approach with her own actions during her divorce: “It’s not nice. I would do that. I did that with my child when I separated with her dad, but I didn’t see my mom doing it.”

She confirmed finding peace before her father’s passing: “When he died, I had already forgiven him. I would talk to him and I loved him. I really did. I wish things were different because the two minutes that I spent with him when he was still with my mom, I enjoyed.”

Koetle’s testimony highlights ongoing discussions about parental responsibility during family breakdowns.